Domestic Violence & Sexual Assault Information and Resources

Sexual Assault & Consent

You wouldn't put up with that. So don't put up with this. 1 in 5 women will be sexually assaulted by the time they finish college.

Understanding what consent is, is as simple as making a cup of tea.

Sexual Assault is NEVER the victim's / survivor's fault!

Many victims of sexual assault within a relationship / marriage do not identify it as sexual assault. The reason being is because they feel it is just a part of the relationship / marriage and it is their duty to be intimate with their partner. This is incorrect.

Just because a person is in a relationship / marriage, it does not give ownership of your body to the other person. You still have the right to say. "No." 

If you or someone you know is a victim or survivor of Sexual Assault, there are services available for you.

Call us @ (800) 641-3434 to speak with an Advocate.

Shame, isolation and confusion: Abuse survivors on the complexities of domestic violence

United Nations study out this week (11/27/18) finds domestic violence is one of the most common killers of women around the world. About 50,000 women were killed in 2017 by an intimate partner or family member, meaning an average of about 137 women are murdered every day -- by someone they know.

In the U.S. alone, an estimated one in four women is a victim of severe physical abuse. Domestic abuse is an epidemic "CBS This Morning" has been digging into for months. Earlier this year, we asked viewers to send in submissions for our series, Note To Self, and found close to 100 of those notes mentioned a history of domestic violence.

Two of those women are part of a group of five who sat down with CBS News' Alex Wagner to discuss their experiences. Leslie Morgan Steiner is a New York Times bestselling author; Lovern Gordon is the president of a non-profit; Rania Batrice served as Bernie Sanders' deputy campaign manager; Lisa Hurley worked for the U.N.; and Judy Freeman Chambers is a municipal judge. You can watch their interview in the links provided below.
 

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/domestic-violence-survivors-share-their-stories-and-offer-lessons-for-others/

 

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/more-than-half-of-women-slain-in-2017-were-killed-by-family-intimate-partners-study-finds/

 

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/link-between-domestic-violence-mass-killings/

                                                                                                                          

 

 

                                                                                                            DIY Cybersecurity for Domestic Violence

 

 

 

 

Why Cybersecurity?

Domestic violence isn't always physical. Many intimate partners exert control using the technologies we rely on everyday. Being intimidated by constant phone-calls, stalked by location-sharing apps, humiliated on social media, forced to share sensitive texts and passwords: each of these experiences is a violation of privacy that affects your freedom to make decisions about your life. Being deprived of your autonomy is no less painful when it's digital.

DIY Cybersecurity asserts your privacy online. When you're threatened by your partner, you can always reach out to a domestic violence professional. But whenever you need to protect yourself online, you're not alone. Threat Scenarios explore, in-depth, how to resist a controlling partner. Each guide is accessible and empathetic: you're not obliged to follow any of our suggestions if you don't feel they're right for you. They also have Defense Strategies for proactively securing your digital life.

There's a quick exit button in the sidebar in case you need to suddenly leave the site. If you want to make sure there's no history of your visit, please read their guide on Private Web Browsing. We hope you find strength and security. You deserve it.

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Many victims/survivors use drugs as a way to cope with the trauma that happened to them. Others have become dependent because that was another way for their abusers to have power & control over their victim - causing the victim to become addicted.
Victims of domestic violence who struggle with addiction face significant barriers to receiving treatment, but programs that effectively address addiction and abuse-related trauma are available.

Please click the link below for more information. 

Domestic Violence, Sexual Assault and Substance Abuse

Power & Control Wheels

Cycle of Violence

Domestic violence often follows a repeating cycle within each relationship. Not every abusive relationship follows this pattern, but many survivors describe their relationships in this way. The longer a person stays in the abusive relationship, they begin to see that eventually the Reconciliation & Honey Moon phases fade away.

Power & Control Wheel

Relationship violence is a combination of a number of different tactics of abuse that are used to maintain power and control. The center is surrounded by different sets of behaviors that an abusive partner uses in order to maintain this power and control. A lot of these behaviors can feel subtle and normal — often unrecognizable until you look at the wheel in this way. Many of these can be happening at any one time, all as a way to enforce power within the relationship.

LGBTQ+ Power & Control Wheel

While many tactics of abuse in LGBTQ+ relationships are similar to heterosexual relationships, it is important to recognize there are some differences and additional forms of power and control: Does your partner…. *Threaten to “out” you or tell others about your sexual orientation or gender identity? *Isolate you from LGBT spaces or limit your interaction with your community? *Use homophobia, biphobia or transphobia against you?

Teen Power & Control Wheel

While many tactics of abuse in Teen relationships are similar to adult relationships, it is important to recognize there are some differences and additional forms of power and control: Does your partner: *Threaten to tell their friends about intimate details of your relationship? *Ignore you in school when they are with their friends? *Bully you in school? *Make you feel bad about being involved in school extra curricular activities? *Threaten to ruin your social status?

Abuse of Children

Many times in abusive relationships where there are also children, the children are also being abused.

Cycle of Abuse involving Pets

Very much like the relationship cycle of violence, violence against animals can be used in the same way to get the victim to comply with the abuser's demands. The way animals are regarded in a family is a window into interpersonal relationships and family dynamics.

Power & Control Wheel using Pets

When animals are abused, people are at risk; when people are abused, animals are at risk. Animal abuse is a form of power and control used to manipulate, intimidate, and retaliate against others in domestic violence. It is one part of the Duluth Model of Power and Control used widely in the domestic violence field.

Equality Wheels

Equality in Relationships

These are qualities that live within a healthy relationship.

LGBTQ+ Equality Wheel

These are qualities that live within a healthy relationship.

Equality in Teen Relationships

These are qualities that live within a healthy relationship.

Nurturing Children

These are the qualities of a healthy relationship with your children.

Healing from Abuse

Healing from abuse can sometimes be a very lengthy process, but it is possible.

Safety Planning

Everyone deserves to be safe. Whether you're not ready to leave or are in the process of leaving, it's helpful to have or be thinking of a safety plan for yourself, your children, and your pets. For a printable / downloadable version of a sample safety plan click here and here for a pet safety plan.


If you or someone you know is in a Domestic Violent / IPV (Intimate Partner Violence) relationship and are in need of services, please call our 24 Hr Crisis line @ (800) 641-3434 to speak with an Advocate who can work with you in devising a personalized safety plan, and that can speak with you about available services. 

Are you a teen who is in an abusive relationship? We have advocates who can help you who are trained to work with young people.

Our crisis line is available 24/7 - (800) 641-3434.

Click the image below to find out more information about abuse in relationships...and how, LOVE is NOT ABUSE.

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