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Male Domestic Violence / Sexual Assault

Many men don’t seek help for domestic abuse because they fear that it will make them look weak. The truth? There are few actions that require as much bravery as walking away from an abusive relationship. To recognize that you are in need of help and then take the steps needed to get it is not weakness. It’s a sign of strength.
The Avalon Center is here for you.
We believe you. 

No one deserves to be abused. Your gender does not mean that you just need to "Man up" and deal with the violence.

Many times men receive an unsympathetic reaction from friends. Sometimes the minute they start talking about what their partner is doing to them their friends respond with, ‘C’mon man, buck up.’ 'You're afraid ?!'

Then the man feels like he’s not a "real" man. It can be very emasculating.

If you are a victim / survivor, you do not need to suffer in silence. Our Advocates are trained in Trauma Informed Care, and will provide you with a safe, accepting, welcoming, and compassionate environment so you can receive the services you deserve.

24/7 Crisis Line (800) 641-3434

Is she extremely jealous?

Does she insist you let her go through your phone?

Does she constantly accuse you of cheating on her with a co-worker?

Does she call you derogatory names?

Does she question your ability to "be a man"?

Does she isolate you from your friends and family?

All are signs of abuse...and none of them are physical. Abuse is not always physical. It can also be mental and emotional. 

Sexual Assault

Sexual assault can happen to anyone, no matter your age, your sexual orientation, or your gender identity. Men and boys who have been sexually assaulted or abused may have many of the same feelings and reactions as other survivors of sexual assault, but they may also face some additional challenges because of social attitudes and stereotypes about men and masculinity.

Some men who have survived sexual assault as adults feel shame or self-doubt, believing that they should have been “strong enough” to fight off the perpetrator. Many men who experienced an erection or ejaculation during the assault may be confused and wonder what this means. These normal physiological responses do not in any way imply that you wanted, invited, or enjoyed the assault. If you were sexually assaulted, it was not your fault.

“Unwanted or abusive sexual experiences” is how we refer to past sexual experiences that can cause a variety of problems, long after they happened.

Our words are carefully chosen, because we strive to:

  1. Respect every man’s experience and point of view.

  2. Avoid any definitions or labels that could drive away any man sorting through his own unique experiences and options.

We also want to emphasize what “unwanted or abusive sexual experiences” does not mean…

By “unwanted” we do not mean that the experience had to be unwanted when it happened.For example, a boy may feel that he wants sexual contact with an adult (especially if the adult has manipulated him). Instead, when we say “unwanted,” we mean:

  • Looking back now, is that an experience you want to have happened, to be part of your life?

  • Do you want to be having negative thoughts and feelings and behaviors that, looking back now, you suspect or believe are (at least partly) caused by that experience?

 

The “or” in “unwanted or abusive” does not imply that any unwanted sexual experience was also “abusive.” We don’t believe this is true. We’re just hoping that “unwanted” works well enough when it comes to describing past sexual experiences that may have contributed to problems you have now.

(Information from 1in6.org)

If you are a victim / survivor, you do not need to suffer in silence. Our Advocates are trained in Trauma Informed Care, and will provide you with a safe, accepting, welcoming, and compassionate environment so you can receive the services you deserve.

24/7 Crisis Line (800) 641-3434

Resources:

Below is a list of organizations aside from the Avalon Center who work with providing services for men.

Clicking on the name will direct you to their website.